Desire… the root of all kink and want.
From a desperate longing to a brief flash of flame.. it is something searched for and found unexpected.
There is so much wrapped up in that one little word. The anticipation of a first date.. The dread of rejection… The need to be loved for who you are. Desire motivates us to do things we would never think of or try without it.
Desire drives us to sacrifice, to cry havoc and loose parts of ourselves that steal our very breath away. It can be beautiful or disastrous. Not all desire is healthy, or even sane. But that does not make us want it any less. Each experience we have inspires some kind of desire. It can be anything that sparks desire, a look.. a certain way of moving.. creativity.. a glimpse of forbidden skin.. the way they speek.. intelligence.. the lines of their silhouette.. anything.
The basis of all desire lays in the mind. Through it all want and need derive.
Why do we desire?
What do we desire?
Who do we desire?
Does it even matter at all why if we do?
These are all the questions we should ask ourselves. I have my own answers but everyone will have their own.
For me.. i desire because my experience and memory draws me to things I enjoy. even if those things are not yet known to me.
I desire connection. that above all else but personal serenity. I desire love like I need to breathe, a deep seated desire for affection and touch rooted in my own personal demons. From the lightest loveing touch to the fierce passion of lust driven sex. I desire to be desired, wanted, needed. I desire inspiration, the bright flame of creation that burns me hollow and drives me to obsession until it is complete.
Who do I desire? A goddess of divine mind and body. Broken in ways that make me want to wrap her in the safety of my arms and words. imperfections that make her perfect in my eyes. stimulating and inspiring, enticing and seducing in the same breath. Playful and elegant, caring and compassionate. Kinky and quick with a laugh. And most of all… deserving of being loved without reservation or judgement… You may be wondering if such a woman exists.. and if she does.. how would I ever know she is all the things I desire? Simple.. i will tell her everything. Share my secrets and flaws.. and instead of judgement… she will inspire me to show her wonders.
Desire is the dream that shows us what hides in the deepest parts of our souls. We can fight it, push it down and force ourselves to forget. Leaving us unsure of why we feel so cold and empty all the time.
Or… we can embrace it. Dive deep and take a deep breath when we are sure we will drown. Fill our lungs with passion and let our blood burn.
I will leave you with this final thought..
If you could.. at this very moment.. have the desire that tightens your chest, shortens your breath, and blurs your thoughts and vision. What would you give? What would you do to have it? What would you risk? How far would you go to seek it out?
Think hard… each of us finds our own limits and must decide. Is it worth the risk?
I have made my choice. I choose to follow my desire and cling to hope. I choose to feel alive, and trust the fates have not foretold doom, But woven my life with purpose to bring me to the one who will cherish and understand my gift.
Best wishes -SirHanz