Category: exercise

Diet day 3.. ish.

Why must beer taste better when your abs are sore? I swear it does. Had stir fry last night and a soda but I took cookie for a late night run so hopefully that will burn the soda calories. Fuck this beer tastes good. Hmm.. I wonder if one of the local breweries would sponsor my blog if I had enough followers.. what do you think? Should I be a shill for free beer? Do drunk crunches all day and dom by night?… naw… but it was a fun thought. Although… if it were a salsa company I would have trouble saying no.. just putting it out there.. you read me Mark’s good stuff salsa? The salsa that is the most amazing thing on the shelf. And good ole Pace.. I cant forget you.. you are a meal in a jar. 🤠

Ok ok.. back to diet. I usually dont eat breakfast anyways (a cup of tea does me just fine) had a salad for lunch. (Small salad because the damm grocery store put all the brown and wilted lettuce in the center and covered it with the nice looking leaves). And now I am haveing a quarter of a bag of salsa verde chips (not portioning, that was all that was left in the bag). Have yet to decide what I am doing for dinner but there is a frozen pizza in the freezer that has curves in all the right places… but I must resist! Why must the beer taste so good? Why? Hmm.. maybe a good night for tacos.. who am I kidding.. its always a good night for tacos.

Best wishes -SirHanz

Diet. Day 1.

Soo.. fail. Had tacos. Well.. they were fryed portabella mushroom and pickled carrot with avocado tacos.. so not too bad.. but… it was both fried food and tacos all at once. So.. not so bad? . . . . . . . I can hear you laughing at me. 😑😏 ah! But I made up for it! 20min on the elliptical should balance the calories from 2 tacos. . . . And a coke. 180 calories in a coke? Are you shitting me? Fuck! Back to the elliptical. . . . In a bit.. maybe.. fuck it, I will just have a salad tomorrow and feel good about my body image in the morning. Tonight I want a beer. Anyone know how many calories are in a hefeweizen? And do I count the lemon wedge?

Also.. how the hell can every other profile on tinder be a pic of some lady working her ass of in a gym and still claim they are not a masochist? You are literally torturing yourself to look good. I think that’s awsome but let’s not lie to ourselves. A gym is a trick played apon lady’s by a vary clever sadist. “Hay! I have an idea.. ladys will actually pay us to torture themselves if we tell them it will make them more attractive ” brilliant. Fucking genius level sadisum.

*facepalm* and I am just as big a sucker as any of them. Time for crunches and pushups. Worst part is I cant even cheat and not do as many even though no one is watching because dammit I would know.

Bettering myself with vitriol -SirHanz

Update: my little workout buddy cookie helped by laying on my chest while I did crunches.. and biteing my chin. Helped with pushups by encouraging me by biteing my ankles and trying to hump my leg. . . You know.. so I would have to do them while shaking him off.