Dear diary 2

Well… it’s Saturday.. the end of a long week. I saw a white crane yesterday at work. I am going to take it as a good sign.

It has been a week since I started my diet/exercise routine. Last night I had salad and some leftover pasta salad from the night before. I did crunches, pushups, and 10min on the elliptical with the difficulty set to max. Not much outward change yet but I can definitely feel that the muscles are tighter and a little more toned. Oh.. and my legs look great.. but they always have. 😆 this morning I took cookie for a jog. I think he enjoyed that quite a bit.

In other news my back injury is slowly getting better. I will probably not be back to lifting stumps or tossing bags of concrete for at least another week just to be safe but progress is a good sign.

I have been talking a lot with my wonderful muse. She is so amazing.. I love that she is probably smarter than I am. (And that’s really saying something) we challenge each other in different ways and I am enjoying the dance. (Note to self.. learn to dance in real life.) She is supportive of my creativity and stunningly beautiful. Who could ever want for more?

I have also discovered through our conversations a new aspect of myself. For the right woman.. with just the right personality.. I am a switch. *gasp* shocking! I know! I was and still am a bit unsure as I explore this new side of myself. I will make mistakes I have no doubt.. but I learn quickly. I have never had the desire to submit to anyone before. This is all new territory for me. At first I was unsure of what I was feeling.. It took me some time to wrap my head around it. But when I did.. I found that I liked it. I am slowly learning what it’s like on the other side of things.. finding out who I am and what I may enjoy as a submissive. You cant see it but I am shaking my head in amazement. Who would have thought.. after twenty some odd years of being a dominant..there would be a woman.. that would inspire feelings of submission in me. I am still feeling amazed at the thought. I cant wait to learn what and where this may take me. In some ways it is all things that I already know. But in the deeper ways of understanding that can only be gained through experience… I am innocent and nieave.

I must admit to being a bit frightened as well. Not of being a submissive sometimes, but of the possibility of losing this new connection and desire. I fear that should something happen and we part ways I may never again find someone who inspires these feelings in me. In 40 years.. I have found only one.. what are the chances of finding a second in my lifetime. So yes… I fear. But I also am full of hope. And as the two mix within me I am inspired in ways I have not been in a vary long time. If nothing else.. I can take comfort in that.

I also decided to repaint my bedroom. It needs it and it will help make the space more “mine” today is my rest day so I may or may not go get paint today but i definitely will tomorrow.

Best wishes -SirHanz

Diet day 5ish..

Today was a busy day but had a healthy lunch of rice and Indian spiced greens. And even skipped the desert cookie.

Thankfully it was not as mind numbingly hot today as yesterday. So I was able to get a bit more done at work today. Even found time at the end of the day to help the elderly couple that live on the hill. They had a problem with their blinds falling, the original installer put the hanging brackets too far apart. So after work I re-mounted all their window blinds. Lol the little old Indian lady insisted I take a mango home with me for my effort.

Got home and made a nice salad with fresh made lemon thyme vinegarette. Then did 15min on the elliptical. Overall a good day I think. Now time for shower, then rest and doggy snuggles.

Dear diary..

Woke up this morning feeling stiff and sore. I think I may have overdone it a bit with the exercise this last weekend. Work should be challenging to say the least. It’s going to be 100 degrees today and I have a ton of things to do. I really should have taken some ibuprofen before leaving the house… oh well.. maybe next time.

I was thinking about how weird it’s going to be to date again on the way to work. It’s not that I am not confident in who I am, I think it’s that when you have not used a skillset in 15 years you tend to be a little nervous about doing it again. I keep telling myself that its not like I am rushing to find someone but i am trying to put myself out there more.

Had a simple lunch of rice and curry, one of the benefits of working where I do is free Indian cooking. It’s usually nothing fancy but it’s good and healthy.

I rescued a damsel in distress today. One of the residents at the temple was loading boxes on her golf cart and one slipped, landing on the gas pedal. The cart took of and embedded itself in the woods. Fortunately she nor the cart were badly hurt but it took me about 20 minutes with the chainsaw to free the cart from the trees.

I am fairly shure my brain is cooked. Did 10hrs today out in the sun. And whew.. I definitely needed a shower when i got home. A long cold one. But all clean and smelling good again. Now if only i could shake this heat headache. Maybe food will help. Just took the pizza out of the oven and am letting it cool. (Yes.. I know.. pizza bad for Hanz diet. But was just too tired to go to the store to get something else tonight.) Besides I am fairly shure o lost about 2lbs today just from working out in the heat.. pants were feeling a little loose by the time I got home.

I hope your day was cooler than mine.

Best wishes -SirHanz

Diet day 3.. ish.

Why must beer taste better when your abs are sore? I swear it does. Had stir fry last night and a soda but I took cookie for a late night run so hopefully that will burn the soda calories. Fuck this beer tastes good. Hmm.. I wonder if one of the local breweries would sponsor my blog if I had enough followers.. what do you think? Should I be a shill for free beer? Do drunk crunches all day and dom by night?… naw… but it was a fun thought. Although… if it were a salsa company I would have trouble saying no.. just putting it out there.. you read me Mark’s good stuff salsa? The salsa that is the most amazing thing on the shelf. And good ole Pace.. I cant forget you.. you are a meal in a jar. 🤠

Ok ok.. back to diet. I usually dont eat breakfast anyways (a cup of tea does me just fine) had a salad for lunch. (Small salad because the damm grocery store put all the brown and wilted lettuce in the center and covered it with the nice looking leaves). And now I am haveing a quarter of a bag of salsa verde chips (not portioning, that was all that was left in the bag). Have yet to decide what I am doing for dinner but there is a frozen pizza in the freezer that has curves in all the right places… but I must resist! Why must the beer taste so good? Why? Hmm.. maybe a good night for tacos.. who am I kidding.. its always a good night for tacos.

Best wishes -SirHanz

Diet. Day 1.

Soo.. fail. Had tacos. Well.. they were fryed portabella mushroom and pickled carrot with avocado tacos.. so not too bad.. but… it was both fried food and tacos all at once. So.. not so bad? . . . . . . . I can hear you laughing at me. 😑😏 ah! But I made up for it! 20min on the elliptical should balance the calories from 2 tacos. . . . And a coke. 180 calories in a coke? Are you shitting me? Fuck! Back to the elliptical. . . . In a bit.. maybe.. fuck it, I will just have a salad tomorrow and feel good about my body image in the morning. Tonight I want a beer. Anyone know how many calories are in a hefeweizen? And do I count the lemon wedge?

Also.. how the hell can every other profile on tinder be a pic of some lady working her ass of in a gym and still claim they are not a masochist? You are literally torturing yourself to look good. I think that’s awsome but let’s not lie to ourselves. A gym is a trick played apon lady’s by a vary clever sadist. “Hay! I have an idea.. ladys will actually pay us to torture themselves if we tell them it will make them more attractive ” brilliant. Fucking genius level sadisum.

*facepalm* and I am just as big a sucker as any of them. Time for crunches and pushups. Worst part is I cant even cheat and not do as many even though no one is watching because dammit I would know.

Bettering myself with vitriol -SirHanz

Update: my little workout buddy cookie helped by laying on my chest while I did crunches.. and biteing my chin. Helped with pushups by encouraging me by biteing my ankles and trying to hump my leg. . . You know.. so I would have to do them while shaking him off.